Here we are again at the beginning of a new year. I can't believe how quickly time seems to pass. I tell my kids all the time that I wish I could put them in a bottle and close the lid. It is amazing to see my kids learn and grow and become kind, talented, kind individuals, but it also hurts a bit to see them grow up. It is a constant fault of mine to look too far ahead and I constantly find myself in a storm of emotions wondering what it will be like when my kids are grown and create their own families. Will they have time for me? Will my faults cause them to think so much less of me? Will the relationships that I have worked so hard to create be hard to maintain?
With all of this in mind, my goals for this year are around relationships.
1) Building a stronger relationship with Rob. I need to listen more, talk less. I need to learn to ask the right questions and I need to give him what he want and needs, which means thinking less about myself and more about him.
2) Fostering stronger relationships with my children. I want to make time for all of them, individually. I'm not quite sure how I am going to do that, but I am currently thinking about that. I am often overwhelmed by all of them wanting my attention at the same time. I need to find ways to let them know that I am interested in talking, learning, and playing with each of them in an uninterrupted, solo setting. Again, this means thinking less about myself and more about what THEY want to do.
3) Learning about each of my Young Women and praying about how to help them individually.
4) Working on my own relationship with myself. I need to be more self-confident and I need to find time to work on me. Specifically, I have felt like my brain is dying. I literally can't focus on anything anymore. I haven't done anything academic in so long, I can't even read a page of a book without my mind wandering
And, of course, I am vowing to take more pictures of my sweet kiddos this year. I make this resolution every year and I struggle with it. I'll get it eventually. I'm going to keep on trying.
In news this week, I just wanted to record a couple of things. Brooklen had a hockey game yesterday. Only 4 boys from his team showed up. They played for 40 minutes straight. His coach sent the parents of the 4 boys this email today:
Mike, Barry, Rob, Adrienne, Brent, and Susan,
I just wanted to tell you how impressed I was at the way the boys played yesterday. I thought about it most of the day. They showed a tremendous amount of heart and never quit. Even for 8 year olds, it’s tough skating that long without many breaks.
For what it’s worth, a couple of the other coaches offered to give us a couple of their players. I declined, as I have other times we’ve been shorthanded. While I understand all the mites are one big 40 player team, and we all practice together and a lot of the boys are friends, we are still the Valley Electric Team. Our boys don’t get a lot of team bonding, and I very much like the players on our Valley Electric team. I prefer to keep our team intact.
With one player falling ill at the last minute yesterday, and another not showing up, yesterday was pushing the envelope with just 3 skaters. I watched them closely to see if frustration set in; it’s supposed to be fun, not frustrating. I didn’t see any frustration. I saw some tired faces in the locker room, but I also felt a sense of accomplishment from them.
I tip my hat to Isaiah, Jordin, Brooklen, and Andrew.
I loved that sweet email. I really am proud of Brooklen and how hard he has worked in this new sport. I love that he has fought so hard to keep up with the other kids.
On Monday, we took the kids to the roller skating rink. They all competed in races. Brooklen got second to a speed skated, Hurley came in right behind another girl, and brave little Zaya was the only one in her age group, but she took her lap (her first time on roller blades at the rink) and finished. The Nymans and the Whites came too; it was such a fun afternoon.
On New Year's Eve, we had Thomas and Alta Bills and their kids over. I made tacos and we had root beer floats. It was completely low-key and I LOVE that about the Bills family. I feel comfortable not making a fuss around them and we had so much fun hanging out with them.
On New Year's Day, we took the whole family ice skating. I didn't fall once, and by the end, I had Kaiton standing up while I pushed the assist.
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