2017 Week 45

Tonight we had the Menzies Family over for Cafe Rio salads and our yearly donut making.  We only make donuts one time a year and it is one of our favorite family traditions.  The homemade donut recipe that I got from Kenzie's mother-in-law is so amazing!  The kids enjoyed playing and they ate so many donuts that I'm surprised they aren't all sick to their stomachs.

We spent all day Saturday up in Big Rapids for Brooklen's hockey tournament.  They lost both Saturday games, but I always love watching Brooklen play so I was glad that we made the trip to be with him.  Last night, Brooklen and Rob also got to go with his team to a Michigan State/Ferris State hockey game.

This week Hurley also had another appointment with her counselor, Laurie.  I was very excited to learn that she went back with Laurie alone and that she talked quite a bit with her.  In the past, she has had a hard time opening up.  I am so happy that she has been making a lot of progress.  It is so good to see her smiling again!

2017-Week 44

I was asked by the Stake RS presidency to conduct an experiment in my life over the next 4 months that would help me grow closer to Christ.  I've thought about this and one thing I want to focus on is becoming more like him.  We learned about some Christlike attributes in RS a couple of weeks ago and I've been thinking a lot about them.  The last couple of months have been a little darker than normal for me. . . dealing with helping Hurley overcome some anxiety issues,  dealing with my own worries about everything, facing a lot of responsibilities, and overall just trying to be a good mom and wife and remain positive, being everyone's cheerleader.  As we were learning about Christ's attributes, I wondered if maybe I strove to be a little more like him, and focused on him a little more in my life, if maybe I could bring more light in to my life.

I'm still not completely sure all of the attributes I'm going to study and work on, but I know the first one is going to be faith.  My testimony could certainly always be stronger.  I know I struggle with doubt in my life.  It starts off as doubting my abilities, my thoughts, etc and then sometimes translates in to bigger things.

So, this week I'm going to study faith.  I'm going to study faith in Jesus Christ's life and I'm going to read some general authorities comments on faith.  To help apply this in my life, I'm going to say more personal prayers.  I think if I want the confirmations of truth, I need to try harder to openly converse with my Heavenly Father.

2017-Week 43

This week Rob was out of town for hunting.  I think he had a good time being in the mountains with his Dad, and he shot 2 deer.

Usually my solo week each year is just exhausting mostly because I stay up WAY too late every night.  This year, however, it was also difficult because of some struggles with my kids.  Hurley had a great week at the gym, but homework and other commitments at home caused her to struggle.  She has a terrible time making decisions and even little ones concerning homework and reading the scriptures cause her major anxiety.  This week, those two tasks were definitely the stressors for her.  I try so hard to constantly be a cheerleader for her.  I want to bring her hope and love.  But, dealing with anxiety also causes me stress, so eventually, I usually break down and get upset.  It was especially hard this week to be the only parent at home because I felt like I neglected my other kids a lot.  Brooklen and Zaya are especially patient with Hurley and with us as we try to help her, but sometimes, it becomes too much for them.

This week, I'm going to focus on recognizing positive things in Hurley's life.  It will take some energy to overcome the anger and sadness she sometimes feels, but I am hoping that if I continually help her recognize the good in her life, she will be able to somewhat silence the reminders of the not so good struggles she sometimes has.

On Friday, I got to go in and help with Hurley's class party.  Friday evening, we had a double movie night!

On Saturday, we went to Leamans Green Apple Barn to play and then we picked Rob up from the airport.  Later in the evening, I took Brooklen over to the Leonhardts to perform a campfire program for scouts.  I loved watching him help perform the skits.

2017-Week 42

I've really gotten off track this year with this whole journal thing. And . . . as I've said so many times before, I haven't taken near enough pictures this year.  I've had a few moments recently where I've panicked knowing that my kids are growing up so fast.  What if I can't remember how they sounded and the cute things they said.  I already have a terrible, terrible memory, so there is no way I'm going to remember those precious details that I want to never forget.  I do take pictures on my iPhone and I think for Christmas, I'm going to ask Rob to print them for me.  But . . . that's not enough.  I need to do better.  I'm going to have to brainstorm some ideas for how I can be more consistent at this.

This week has been an exciting but crazy one.  First, Ethan and Jami got married in Arizona.  Kaiton and I were able to make a quick trip to Arizona to be with them for the wedding.  We left super early (3:30am) Wednesday morning and we took a red-eye back  on Thursday night.  We got back in to town on Friday morning.  While we were gone, Rob's parents came to visit and they just left today.  So it's been crazy and hectic, but we've had some good times with family.

Since it's been so long since I've written, I think I'm just going to list some significant events that have happened lately.

1) We've received several comments from teachers, primary instructors, etc about Brooklen and Hurley.  They are both such thoughtful, studious kids.  I think we are so lucky that our kids strive to make good choices.  The primary chorister mentioned to Rob that Brooklen is such an awesome kid.  She said that he ALWAYS sings, even if he isn't always on key.  Boys his age often care more about what their peers think, so she was grateful he makes good choices anyway.   I also randomly got this email from Hurley's teacher this week: "I know that you already know this, but I just wanted to share that Hurley is incredibly bright and I know she will make a positive impact on the world one day."
2) A cute story about Zaya.  She came home at the beginning of the school year and told me that she got a new music teacher at school.  She said, "MOM!  He's the ONLY person I've ever met that sings better than you and I!"
3) Brooklen ran in a district 1-mile Fun Run at school.  I was so proud of him for getting out there and running that race.
4) I went with some girlfriends to Mackinaw Island for an 8-mile race around the island.  My pace was 9:02, which was not as fast as I had hoped for, but I was pretty happy with it considering I'd never ran that far before.  I still don't love running, but I loved proving to myself that I could do it.
5) Hurley started seeing a counselor for her anxiety.  I'm sucking up information left and right trying to figure out how to help her learn to manage her anxiety.  I have a lot of faith, but there are days when I am frustrated because I can't help the little girl that I love so much.
6) Kaiton is LOVING preschool.  Since it is only two days a week, he's been asking me to hold preschool at home for him on the days her doesn't go to Chippewa. He know the schedule at preschool and wants us to follow the same schedule.  Last week he said to me, "Mom, I don't even need to go to preschool anymore.  I like doing it at home better."  I can't get enough of that little boy.
7) I've been volunteering in Zaya's classroom every week.  I am so grateful I can do that this year.  I love being with her and seeing how she is with her friends.

2017-Week 36

Just a quick update this week.  Rob was called as Elder's quorum president today.  I know that he will do an amazing job at this calling.  He some great ideas and I think that he is a very likable leader.  He called Thomas Bills and Michael Lowe to be his counselors and I think that both of those men will support him well.  I know that we may be a little busier than normal now, and I'm slightly worried that his stress level will rise, but I have a lot of faith that we will be blessed as he serves in this calling.

2017- Week 35

School starts on Tuesday and I am a little sad to send my kids back, but I think that they are totally ready to learn again. I can't believe that Brooklen is going to be a 5th grader this year! It's crazy to think that I still remember those days when it was just him and I all day. If only I would have realized how free I was back then! Sometimes I just wish I could do it all over again so that I could completely appreciate that time. I took some pictures earlier this summer after Hurley was baptized. I'm finally getting around to posting them.

Week 33

The summer is coming to an end. We have two weeks of no school left and although I think we are all ready for school to start, it will be bittersweet. I've enjoyed the time that we have been able to spend at the pool, the beach, the library and other fun places in Midland. I do feel a bit guilty though, because this summer has been a little hard for me. We've had a lot going on and with the different age's of my kids, its getting hard to satisfy everyone at once. Kaiton still loves playing at parks and Brooklen is definitely not entertained by those types of activities. The highlights of the past week or two are: 1) I shot a wedding and I am SO GLAD IT IS OVER. I will not be shooting weddings anymore. I just don't have it in me. I don't like the pressure, being away from my family, or the fact that I am always underwhelmed by my wedding work. I feel quite a weight lifted off of me to have that be all over. 2) Brooklen had his birthday party at the Loons game. He invited Jake, Ethan, Carter, and Jordyn. They had an awesome time eating dinner and watching the game. 3)We spend a day at Tawas and it was so fun. We rented a stand-up paddle board for the first time and we all loved it! Then, we ate at a little Mexican place and then played at the State Park. So fun! 4) We took a day off of work and gymnastics to head to Bay City State Park and play at the beach. 5) We went blueberry picking for FHE. I also have to report that since being given a Father's blessing, Hurley has done much better with her emotions and anxiety and Brooklen has been able to not wet the bed. I love Rob so deeply and I am so grateful that he is a worthy priesthood holder. I love that my kids are seeing how the priesthood can work miracles in their lives.

Week 31

This post will be short and sweet. Honestly, I don't have much energy lately to record much. It has been great having the kids home this summer. I really can't express how much I love them. They are my heart and souls; I am so grateful that Rob and I have the chance to raise them. But, with the opportunity to raise them, comes a tremendous amount of responsibility and it scares me sometimes. I know that the world that my kids are being raised in is scary. There is still a lot of good and light out there, but it more difficult than ever to see it sometimes. Hurley has struggled this summer. At first I thought it was just a phase, and then I was convinced it was anxiety, but I think after reading several books, that she has OCD and I yearn to help her leave the trap that is taking her little brain and making life sometimes so miserable for her. My once free and confident daughter has become immersed in self-doubt, rituals, and the compulsion to always have perfection. I have so much hope for her and I know that if I do enough research, I can help her through this. Today, Rob gave her a priesthood blessing. We are trying to be loving and positive, but like all parents, sometimes we falter out of frustration. My daily prayers have turned to pleas to my Father in Heaven to help relieve her of this and to help guide Rob and I as we work with her to overcome this.

Week 27-28

We left 2 Sundays ago for our summer vacation with my family. We left Midland really early in the morning and flew to Los Angeles. We arrived in California around lunchtime and my dad and Ethan picked us up from the airport and took us to the rental house to meet everyone else. We decided to stay in Anaheim since we were doing 2 Disney days and I am really glad we did. It was so nice to be so close to the theme park so we didn't have a long drive home after the long Disney days. On Sunday afternoon, the kids swam in the awesome pool (it had a lazy river and a rock waterslide) and had fun exploring the house and their new rooms. The girls room was princess themed and the boys room was car themed. On Sunday evening, my mom made some amazing carne asada tacos and we had a short family home evening. On Monday, we woke up early and headed out to Disneyland. The kids had so much fun this time around. Brooklen and Hurley could ride all of the rides and Zaya, Maeli, and Milo could ride most of them. I'm not so into the roller coasters these days, so I volunteered to take the little boys to lots of rides while the men and the big kids did the thrill rides. We stayed late on Monday night so that we could see the Disney firework show. The kids really enjoyed it, so it was totally worth any grumpiness we had to deal with the next day. Tuesday was the 4th of July. My cousin Cinco, and his wife, Amy had invited us over to their home in Agoura Hills for a barbecue that day. It was so nice to see Cinco and Amy. I haven't seen them since I lived in Los Angeles when I was in my twenties; they are such wonderful people. The kids had a blast swimming in their pool and they were especially excited that Cinco had a big pile of Despicable Me merchandise for them to take home! On Wednesday, we had another early theme park day. This time, we went to Universal Studios. I hadn't been to Universal since I was a kid and I was pleasantly surprised with how fun it was. My favorite thing was the studio tour and the Butter Beer at Harry Potter Land (we unsuccessfully tried to copy it for Sunday dinner a few days later). On Thursday, we spent the day at the rental house. It was so much fun. The kids spent almost the entire day in the pool. In the evening, Ethan, my dad, Rob, and Brooklen went to a Dodgers vs Diamondbacks game. They ate Dodger dogs, got free bobbleheads, and Brooklen got to spend the Dodger stadium gift card that Ethan had given him for his birthday. The rest of us stayed back at the house and ate In n Out and then watched movies. Ryan, Kenzie, Hunter, and I stayed up late talking. On Friday, we went to Disneyland again. We spent most of the day at California Adventure, but we went back over to Disney later in the evening. On Saturday, we went to see Despicable Me 3 at this awesome theater that had reclining seats. I felt like a queen! It was really fun to see Cinco's movie together as a family! Afterwards, we went back to the house and swam for the rest of the day. I made pizza on the grill for dinner. Sunday morning we woke up really early and drove to Arizona. At 2:30, Rob's mom got in to Arizona. We baptized Hurley at 5:00pm and then we went back to my parents house for dinner and dessert. We also got to meet Jami, Ethan's fiance and her 2 boys, Parker and Jayden. They immediately got along really well with Brooklen and she is a real sweetheart. The baptism was really sweet. Annette and my mom spoke, Maeli, Hurley, and Zaya sang, "When I am Baptized," my dad conducted and Brooklen and Hurley said the prayers. Hurley is such a sweet girl and I am so excited for her and proud of her that she decided to be baptized. We had steak, potatoes, rolls, and caesar salad for dinner and my mom made cookies and ice cream sundaes for dessert. On Tuesday, we went to a trampoline park in the morning. Jami and her boys came and Annette was also with us. Afterwards, we went to lunch with my dad and Ethan and then we all went back to my parent's house to swim. My mom made really good tacos for dinner and then we took Annette back to the airport. Kim wasn't able to come because he just finished his stem cell transplant. I was grateful that Annette made it a priority to come out and that she was able to leave Kim for the day. We enjoyed our time with her. On Monday night, the kids played and rode horses before bed. The girls spent the night at Kenzie and Ryan's house. On Wednesday, we spent the day at home swimming and playing. My mom and I also took Brooklen, Hurley, and Kaiton to feed the ducks. At night, the boys took the kids to Chick Fil A for free chicken day and my mom, Kenzie, and I went to Last Chance. I was so sad to leave my family. I just love my time with them, but it was nice to come back home. One thing that was interesting on a trip was that several of us got to spend much needed time with Hunter. He isn't going to church right now and doesn't live the exact same values as the rest of us, but while we were on vacation, I had several strong feelings that I just needed to let him know how much I love him. I can't control the decisions he makes, but I know he is a good person and I want him to be a part of my life. I was so grateful for the chance to express my love for him.

Week 25

I took some pictures of Brooklen, Hurley, and Rob playing on the bed a few weeks ago and I am finally getting around to posting them: